After talking (in my earlier post) about the ultrasound I have each time I visit my obstetrician, I was asked if I was concerned about the potential health risks of such frequent scans. Most women, in a regular pregnancy, will have 2-3 scans unless issues arise or complications are diagnosed. I'm having one a month at present, and I assume if my doctor continues on in the same way I will have them more frequently as my appointments increase.
The simple answer is no, I'm not concerned about the health risks. While it's clear that little in depth research has been done on the long-term health issues associated to ultrasounds, I am comfortable with the research that has been done. From my reading, I'm satisfied that what I gain from these ultrasounds far outweighs the risks I am taking. To clarify, while I'm not having these ultrasounds for specific diagnostic services, I certainly get something out of them.
For me, the opportunity to look on a monitor, see and hear a heartbeat and wriggling baby is a huge psychological relief. It helps me to keep my anxiety in check. After miscarrying (and my generally far-from-optimistic outlook) previously and the earlier bleeding in this pregnancy, it is an effort for me to allow myself to relax and enjoy this process without becoming scared of what might happen or how things are progressing. As I leave my obstetrician's office after each visit I feel reassured and more able to allow myself to further attach to this bubble baby.
Clearly, there is no physical need for me to have these scans. The simple fact is that the benefits outlined above are, for me, vital. My mental health requires management in the same way that my physical health does, and I feel that this is a heavy weight on the side of 'worth it' vs. the risks. The commonly asked question by most people concerned over potential health issues is "why would you take any more risks than you have to just to see an image of your baby, there's no real benefit in doing so is there?" I have my answer to that question; yes, for me, there is benefit to how I'm managing this pregnancy.
The scans I have (besides the regular 12 week scan when checking for risks of Downs Syndrome) are less than five minutes long, in fact they are probably less than three minutes. My obstetrician doesn't attempt to diagnose anything from the scans other than whether the baby is in fact there, with a beating heart. She doesn't take the time to find a comprehensive angle and do show-and-tell, the purpose is not to give me an added bonus picture show. I'm satisfied that the potential risks as outlined in the reading I've done are not increased to a point I'm uncomfortable with in these short moments. As she herself explained at my first appointment, she has the equipment in her office and she likes to do a quick visual as a matter of routine. I'm sure if I requested that we stopped, she would support that choice, but the sense of well being I have after each appointment means I am happy to continue these quick scans.
I read an interesting post from a Canadian blogger in regards to the growing trend of ultrasounds-at-your-convenience and 3D ultrasounds. I've never been tempted to do a 3D ultrasound, mostly because I do see them as another commodity being sold to parents in the never ending marketing cycle. I'm also not concerned with how my baby looks, that's not what appeals to me about ultrasounds in general, and I don't see how a 3D ultrasound is anything other than a more realistic peeking device. I'm content to see hands, feet a head and a torso. If they're still there I don't need more detail.
By the way, I'm booked in for my full/proper 20 week ultrasound where a real ultrasound tech does a more detailed visual analysis of bubble baby next week, so be ready for me to do an about-face and tell you about how I need to see every detail I can and will not be satisfied until I do.
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6 comments:
I stumbled across your blog a while ago and have been reading it on and off during boring periods at work. I just wanted to tell you that as someone else who had a miscarriage at 19.. I am so excited for you!
I wasn't really that keen on having children until I found out I was pregnant and then the uncontrollable maternal instinct kicked in out of nowhere and would not got away, I found it hard to go back to that not being a possibility and it ended up destroying my relationship. Now at 22 I am impatient at times to just grow up and have babies but i know the reality of that is quite some years off. And I am terrified that when it does happen I will lose it again. So reading about you has been some what of a comfort.
Goodluck!
Thank you so much, Anon. It's so nice to hear from someone who has been in the same situation and knows what it is like to have the same desires, worries and fears.
My relationship with my partner at 19 fell apart too, which I'm certain was a direct result of the stress and emotion of the experience. It was far more traumatic than I ever expressed to anyone (other than my partner) at the time and it's taken years to come to terms with.
And yes, I remember all those years of wishing that my life was at the stage where I was content, settled and starting my family. I wasn't hunting for a man to have a family with, I just craved that time so badly it hurt. I hope life gives you plenty of adventures until you get to that place! I am often amazed at some of the experiences I've had and paths I've taken while having that wistful desire in the background the whole time, and I hope they'll make me a better mother.
As for the fear, I don't know if anything can ever take that away. As you can see from my experiences, it's still ongoing for me. I should say, though, that the pure joy I experienced when I found out I was pregnant was enough to convince me that I should just try to enjoy every minute of the pregnancy I could, regardless of what the outcome would be. I was aware that things could go wrong at any point, but you don't get that time back. Trying to stay detached means you miss that whole first three months, which would be such a pity. Having said that, once I started bleeding instinct kicked in and I shut down without even meaning to. I assumed the worst and gradually become more relaxed as time went on.
It's great to have your company, and really means a lot to know there is someone who 'gets' where I'm coming from.
Oh that was lovely and also reassuring.
Thank you, I hope everything is still going well.
Also my word verification is braman... which is hilarious.
-Gemma
I'm pregnant and have only had one scan so far but I think you make a really important point. It's just as important to nurture our mental health as well as our physical health while pregnant. Stressed mothers lead to stressed babies and all health studies back this up. If a mother needs higher levels of monitoring to achieve a better overall level of health then she should be supported to do so. I'm a nurse, so I see this stuff first hand all the time and I read the raw studies. Go with your instincts.
I got almost weekly scans by the end of my pregnancy - I developed high blood pressure so we were checking on growth. That was just the little heartbeat scans in the office. I also had fortnightly in-depth scans to make sure everything was going well. It's a relief to know there is still a heartbeat. It was a relief to know my placental and the umbilical cord were still working at acceptable levels.
I understand the fear and vulnerability too - I had a small bleed early on and was terrified until the 20 week scan (we didn't have the 12 week). Then when my blood pressure went up I lived on edge for six weeks, wondering if I was going to go into labour REALLY early and if my daughter was going to be okay. Even now I am so much more vulnerable than ever before - I kept a journal while I was pregnant and I was in the second trimester when I ranted about how everyone tells you you're 'safe' except you will always have this child with you now, no matter what happens. And once they're here? It transforms, but you never go back to the invulnerable sort of feeling.
Oh I hear you Lucy, I think that's the ultimate thing I need to come to terms with... this will never end. These worries will morph, but stay with me no matter what. I can't remember where, but I read someone describing having a child as having your heart out there in the world, completely vulnerable and out of your control, every day. For me, I find it especially sad that we are so distrustful of our bodies. I feel better now that my body isn't the only thing that would provide life for this baby. That I don't trust it to do this vital job. I'd rather it be outside me, when in reality the womb is the safest environment it could possibly be in.
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